The Mycenaean

4. Boyz 4 Now (Bob’s Burgers)

Bob’s Burgers is the hit Fox series of a man named Bob, his wife Linda and their three eccentric children Tina, Louise and Gene. The family faces a series of misadventures in and out of their burger joint restaurant.

In episode 21 of the series’ third season, Tina, with the company of her younger sister, Louise, goes to see her favorite boy band in concert. Aside from the oddly hilarious song lyrics (“Let me whisper in your eyes…”), what makes this group so perfect is their dynamic. There are four members, each with a designated personality. Boo Boo, the prepubescent, perfectly named boy,is the lead singer. Griffith is the second lead singer, either 12 or 13 years old. It’s alleged that Griffith has a pet wolf. Matt is the oldest member of the group, around 17. He has facial hair and is very moody. Allen is the shy one, around Griffin’s age and his fans are the “Allen-coholics”. Boo Boo becomes Louise’s first love interest and, through a series of very fortunate happenings, the girls end up on the guy’s tour bus and Louise subsequently slaps Boo Boo right across the face.

 

3. Sev’ral Timez (Gravity Falls)

The Disney series Gravity Falls, shows the mysterious happenings of twins Mabel and Dipper at their great-uncle’s tourist attraction in Gravity Falls, Oregon.

In the first season of Gravity Falls, the episode “Boyz Crazy” premiered. In this episode, Mabel finds out that her favorite boy band is a group of genetically engineered clones, being imprisoned by their manager. Mabel sets them free and upon their release, decides to keep them for herself. Sev’ral Timez is a five member band, consisting of both singers and rappers named Creggy G., Greggy C., Leggy P., Chubby Z. and Deep Chris. Due to them being literally caged their entire lives, they are very animalistic and can’t perform the most minimal tasks outside of singing and dancing. Often times, throughout the episode, they enter rooms by striking poses.

Memorable Quotes: “We’re not threatening!”, “Yo, I think this is food dawg!”

 

2. B-12 (American Dad)

Many of us are already familiar with the show American Dad. It follows the life of an intensely conservative CIA agent named Stan and his family, consisting of: Francine, his wife; Haley, his oldest child and daughter; Steve, his son; resident alien, Roger; and their pet goldfish, Klause.

In season 8, episode 3, “Can I Be Frank With You?”, Steve, along with his closest friends, Snot, Barry and Toshi, form a super band under the name “Boyz 12”. Snot’s uncle decides to manage the boys after saying he’d been “thinking about little boys all night”. The guys then produce the most hilarious song of all time entitled “A Shot of B12”. The song mimics the styles of “The Backstreet Boys” and  “NSync”, as well as countless korean boy bands. The lyrics are plain, repetitive, and just involve each boy describing their distinct role:

 

♪[Verse 1]♪

I’m B1 and I’m tons of fun!

I’m B2, I wanna get with you.

I’m B3, wanna be with me.

I’m B4 and I’ll make ya sore.

I’m B5, I make you feel alive.

I’m B6, I pick up sticks.

I’m B7, I’ll take you to heaven.

I’m B8 and I am GREAT.

I’m B9 and I’m so fine.

I’m B10, I remember when.

I’m B11, I’m in love with B7.

I’m B12, and we’re….

BOYZ 12!

 

This episode was pure genius in that it hits the nail on the head when it comes to boy bands. There are members that are pure visual, like B9, the overly sexualized member like B4 and the one real singer like B6 (later in the song, as the members each introduce their personality, B6 reveals that “[he] can sing.”)

At the end of the show, B12 is officially disbanded as B13 becomes the new hot and happening group.

 

1. Boyz N Motion (That’s So Raven)

That’s So Raven was the 2 time, Emmy Nominated Disney sitcom about a psychic teen by the name of Raven and her best friends Eddy and Chelsea as they find their ways in and out of their whacky situations. It was the highest rated and longest running series during Disney Channel and is the main source of nostalgia for many people today.

“Boyz ‘N Commotion” is the 14th episode in season 3 of That’s So Raven. In this episode, Raven’s favorite band, “Boyz N Motion”, have booked a spot at her father’s restaurant for a private dinner. Through Raven’s bragging, a wild group of fans begins to follow and chase the boys around, leading Raven to invite them to dinner at her house. The Boyz end up spend several days at Raven’s house.

The Boyz are a trio that consist of singers Trey, Ricky and JJJ (“it’s pronounced JJ, the third J is sshhh”). They’re high maintenance, moody, and break out into song whenever possible. They’re number one on this list simply because of this one song:

 

♪[Chorus]

Boyz!

We are the Boyz ‘N Motion

We give you our devotion!

Boyz!

We are the Boyz ‘N Motion

We give you our devotion!

What millennial doesn’t know this song? That’s So Raven was, and will always be a classic in my book.