Satire- WWIII Draft

As conflicts grow in Ukraine, the threat of teenage boys being drafted into the US military grows larger. 

While the US runs on an all-volunteer armed forces policy, tensions between Russia and Ukraine worry pre-pubescent and currently maturing boys that there will be a draft for the first time in 50 years.

As the CEO’s, politicians, and surgeons worry about the war’s effect on the US economy, their close-mindedness distracts them from what’s actually at risk here.

Sure, local troops deployment during times of battle and skyrocketing gas and food prices may be a reason to worry, but just imagine a public school depleted of avid video game players, failed football players, and lunch-time boxers.

Chad Broadmen, a baseball player who just recently missed the varsity cut for the Leesville Road High School baseball team, shares his input about the recent events. 

Broadmen is currently trying to focus on himself as an athlete and hopefully make a career out of his talents. “I have goals, I can’t be deployed during my prime years,” said Broadmen.

As he currently stands as the only junior of JV, he hopes that his team captain position will exempt him from the draft that he so confidently believes will happen.

It’s true, the US military needs men like Broadmen, but at what cost. 

Russia and Ukraine are involved in a two-nation war, but since leagues and pacts are involved, their war feels all too familiar. The US deployed thousands of troops in Romania and Poland, but they’ll surely all die in nuclear battle and more backup will be needed.

Russia has begun drafting male citizens, ages 18 to 27, in recent weeks. Although this is a war in which the US is not officially involved, 16 and 17 year olds have a fair reason to begin to worry about drafting as well.

At this point, all Gen Z can do about the devastations in Ukraine is to begin training for the upcoming draft. 



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